For what has to be the 5 or 6th time in the last few weeks, I got a call from some telemarketing type person claiming to be from local.com. Not to be confused with the seemingly endless calls from yellowpages.com, yellowbook.com, localsearch.com or advertiseonmyass.com.
I honestly think all these calls are coming from one central calling station somewhere in the middle of India. We’ve all heard the stories of how companies go into India, set-up call service centers, teach the locals English and even attempt to make them sound line an American. Well, with the economy being what it is, I think American accent training has gone right out the window and has landed in some 3rd world sewage system because these folks are barely understandable. When I get these types of calls, I feel like I’m talking to a NYC cab driver and the only thing missing is the really bad incense crap they use…that and music that sounds like something out of a far eastern funeral procession.
If they call and ask specifically for me, I give them an easy test – properly pronounce my name. When they fail miserably after 3 attemps, I say thank you and end the call. If they get close, I say thank you and transfer them into my voice mail, ending the call. I have seriously lost my patience for these people.
My other favorite phone calls are robo-calls, especially from the travel services trying to sell me a cruise. The phone rings, I pick it up and then I hear that god awful blllllaaaaaarrrreeee (y’know, the sound a ocean liner makes when it blows it’s stack). Does anybody really pay any attention to those calls? Listen after the sound effect? Press 1 for more options? Book a cruise through these people? If you answered yes to any of those questions let me know because I just…that’s all I can think of to say is I just…because I just wouldn’t know what to say to you.
As I was writing this, the phone rang and the robo-voice on the other end of the phone says “Please press 1 to update your google411 listing.” Google411? What the hell is that? Now what I’d really like to hear is a robo-call with a really bad American accent. At least that would be something new.